Witchy Woman

I have some really great girl friends – the girls that I grew up with at home in Canada, and the lovely ladies that adopted me into their lives when I lived in England. I love love LOVE THEM, and I’m pretty sure that you would, too, if you met them. :) They are fantastic – loving, supportive, witty, funny, smart as hell (there’s not a dumbass amongst them), and they love me, too….which is just the best. :) I can happily report that with most of them, we’ve never had arguments – we may disagree about some things, but…we don’t argue with each other, there’s no drama or fighting going on, nothing. I would like to say it’s because we are above that shit, but…truthfully, I just think we can’t be bothered. Life is too short, we get over things and move on….it’s beautiful. :)

I’ve mentioned before my problems with making friends in San Antonio – I’m sadly coming to the conclusion that the problem must be me, which makes me feel really badly. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, but clearly….it’s something. I was reading an article on my beloved Jezebel today entitled “How To Be Friends With Another Woman” (written by the amazing Roxane Gay) – it’s really great, please be sure to read it – but here’s the gist of it:

1. Abandon the cultural myth that all female friendships must be toxic, bitchy or competitive. This myth is like heels and purses — pretty but designed to SLOW women down.

1A. This is not to say women aren’t bitches or toxic or competitive sometimes but rather to say that these are not defining characteristics of female friendship, especially as you get older.

2. A lot of ink is given over to mythologizing female friendships as curious, fragile relationships that are always intensely fraught. Stop reading writing that encourages this mythology. 

2A. The female friendship in Sheila Heti’sHow Should a Person Be? is actually awesome and powerful. If you read it as otherwise, ask yourself why.

3. If you find that you are feeling competitive, toxic, or bitchy toward the women who are supposed to be your closest friends, look at why and figure out how to fix it and/or find someone who can help you fix it.

4. If you are the kind of woman who says, “I’m mostly friends with guys,” and act like you’re proud of that, like that makes you closer to being a man or something, and less of a woman as if a woman is a bad thing, see Item 3. It’s okay if most of your friends are guys but if you champion this as a commentary on the nature of female friendships, well, soul search a little.

4A. If you feel like it’s hard to be friends with women consider that maybe women aren’t the problem. Maybe it’s just you.

4B. I used to be this kind of woman. I’m sorry.

5. Sometimes, your friends will date people you cannot stand. You can either be honest about your feelings or you can lie. There are good reasons for both. Sometimes you will be the person dating someone your friends cannot stand. If your man or woman is a scrub, just own it so you and your friends can talk about more interesting things. My go to explanation is, “I am dating an asshole because I’m lazy.” You are welcome to borrow it.

6. Want nothing but the best for your friends because when your friends are happy and successful, it’s probably going to be easier for you to be happy.

6A. If you’re having a rough go of it and a friend is having the best year ever and you need to think some dark thoughts about that, do it alone, with your therapist, or in your diary so that when you actually see your friend, you can avoid the myth discussed in Item 1. 

6B. If you and your friend(s) are in the same field and you can collaborate or help each other, do this, without shame. It’s not your fault your friends are awesome. Men invented nepotism and practically live by it. It’s okay for women to do it too. 

6C. Don’t tear other women down because even if they’re not your friends, they are other women and well, this is just important. This is not to say you cannot criticize other women but understand the difference between criticizing constructively and tearing down cruelly. 

6D. Everybody gossips so if you are going to gossip about your friends, at least make it fun and interesting. As a corollary, never say, I never lie or I never gossip because you are lying.

6E. Love your friends’ kids even if you don’t want or like children. Just do it. 

7. Tell your friends the hard truths they need to hear. They might get pissed about it but it’s probably for their own good. The other day my best friend told me to get it together about my love life and demanded an action plan and well, it was irritating but also useful. 

7A. Don’t be totally rude about truth telling and consider how much truth is actually needed to get the job done. Finesse goes a long way.

7B. These conversations are more fun when preceded by an emphatic, “GIRL.”

8. Surround yourself with women you can get sloppy drunk with who won’t draw stupid things on your face if you pass out, and who will help you puke, if you over celebrate and who will also tell you if you get sloppy drunk too much or behave badly when you are sloppy drunk. 

9. Don’t flirt (too much), have sex, or engage in an emotional affair with your friends’ significant others. This shouldn’t need to be said but it needs to be said. That significant other is an asshole and you don’t want to be involved with an asshole that’s used goods. If you want to be with an asshole, get a fresh asshole of your very own. They are abundant.

10. Don’t let your friends buy ugly outfits or accessories you don’t want to look at when you hang out. This is just common sense.

11. When something is wrong and you need to talk to your friends and they ask you how you are, don’t say, “Fine.” They know you’re lying and it irritates them and a lot of time is wasted with the back and forth of “Are you sure?” and “Yes?” and “Really?” and “I AM FINE.” Tell your lady friends the truth so you can talk it out and either sulk companionably or move on to other topics.

12. If four people are dining, split the check evenly four ways. We are adults now. We don’t need to add up what each person had anymore. If you’re high rolling, just treat everyone and rotate who treats. If you’re still in the broke stage, do what you have to do.

13. If a friend sends a crazy e-mail needing reassurance about love, life, family, or work, respond accordingly and in a timely manner even if it is just to say, GIRL, I hear you. If a friend sends you like thirty crazy e-mails needing reassurance about the same damn shit, be patient because one day that’s going to be you tearing up GMAIL with your drama. 

14. My mother’s favorite saying is “qui se ressemble s’assemble.” Whenever she didn’t approve of who I was spending time with she’d say this ominously. It means, essentially, you are who you surround yourself with.

Good stuff, eh? :) Last week, I had a surprising experience with someone who I thought was my friend – and even though, in the grand scheme of life it’s SO not a big deal, it has bothered me and hurt me quite a lot. When I was at my last school, I became quite friendly with one of my co-workers. I liked her a lot, her kids came to the Wee One’s birthday party, we went to their house and birthday parties, it was all good stuff. I got my new job after school had ended for the year – and she heard about it from someone else before I had the chance to tell her (it hadn’t even been confirmed yet – my parents didn’t even know, for Christ sakes). She sent me a snotty text message about my new job, and that was it. I responded, sent her a number of messages over the summer – nada. Now, we know that I’m a person who likes to give others the benefit of the doubt, and I try to always think the best of people – so I assumed that something was amuck with her phone, and that was why she didn’t reply. Last week was the first week back at school with kids, and I sent her an email on our work system, wishing her a good year, hoping that her first couple of weeks back had gone well, and telling her that I missed her. Not only did she not respond, but she deleted the message and then EMPTIED THE TRASH. (our email system at work lets us track such things) I could not believe it – her actions seemed to be among the pettiest I’ve ever seen. I was so irritated I wanted to pick up the phone and rip her a new one, but…that’s not me. I avoid confrontation whenever possible, and I don’t care to yell at people if I can possibly help it. (After 17+ years in Education, and having to discipline a million kids and give them shit and call them on their crap, I guess I just don’t care to deal with it in my personal life) Instead, I left the email I had sent her open on my desktop for a while, just to be sure that I hadn’t sounded bitchy or something (I hadn’t), and then I deleted it and emptied it, too. There was absolutely nothing to be gained by me keeping it around as a constant reminder of yet another person who had done me wrong. I’m chalking the whole thing up to experience (although I have no idea why she is angry with me) – actually, let’s chat about that for a minute, shall we? Is she upset because somebody else told her about my new job before I did? Who cares!!  Get over it, girl!! Be happy for me that I found a new job that I’m better suited for and moooove on! Perhaps she is angry because I am leaving that school (and all of its troubles) – and she is not. If so, well, then I’m sorry, but…that wasn’t a healthy environment for me at all, and I had to go. Also, she could move on, too, if she chose to – she chooses to stay. So – suck it up, Buttercup. As for any other reason she could be pissy – I have NO idea. I just know that her behavior would have been petty and childish had it come from a teenager – let alone a woman in her early 40s. I’m just done with the whole thing.

Finding a supportive female friend is becoming more and more rare, it seems – why is that? Why must women be so competitive with each other? Why must we build ourselves up by tearing those around us down? It’s vile behavior – and something that us smart girls should know better about, don’t you think? I’ve written before about The Incredible Bitch Blog (love her) – she wrote a post a few months ago about Crazy Women at Work…be sure to give it a read, it’s good stuff, and it reminds me so much of all of the crap that women do to each other in the workplace. And WHY? What is the point??! We should be working together to help each other advance, and not purposely sabotaging each other in an attempt to play a giant game of one-ups-manship! It’s ridiculous!!!  Come on, girls…we’re better than this! Let’s act like it!!! If in doubt, give the lovely Caitlin Moran’s book “How To Be A Woman” a read, or, if you’re pressed for time, look over my review :) And be nice to each other…come on. Life’s just way too short, friends. :)

xxx

 

If You’re Reading This

I have written many times of my immense love for the two websites XOJane and Jezebel - I read both throughout the day, am an avid fan of many of their writers (and long to write for them myself), and I link to their sites to share stories and stuff with you guys all the time. However, something odd seems to be happening at XOJane lately…and I’m worried.

 

While Jezebel continues to rock the universe with amazing posts like this one, an excerpt from Caitlin Moran’s excellent EXCELLENT book “How To Be A Woman” (I’m reading it right now – stay tuned for the review in a few days!), where she discusses the different names that women have for their vaginas (this is hilarious), XOJane is insulting their dear readers with mind-numbing buckets of crap like “Why We Don’t Talk About Each Others’ Bodies at XOJane” (which makes sense, really – they don’t talk about bodies with each other because THEY ARE WRITING STUPID ARTICLES ABOUT THEM ALL THE DAMN TIME!!!). I am finding so many contradictions on their site these days: they preach a message of body acceptance, yet we are forced to endure every up and down of one of their writers’  hatred with her self/eating issues (I really do love Emily’s writing, and wish her nothing but the best – just be you, Cupcake, you’re perfect – and get back to writing your good stuff, not this bleak shit you’ve been churning out lately. I get that you may be feeling rough, but.. hang on, sister) … because more and more, these pieces come across as ‘how-to’ articles rather than confessionals that could actually help someone. I can honestly say that after reading XOJane the past couple of months I am MUCH better prepared to enter the world of bulimia and drug addiction than I was before. (NOTE: I’m not intending to go anywhere near either of these…I am useless at making myself barf, and I’m allergic to 99.9% of medications, meaning that a foray into the underground world of drugs would probably kill me. Don’t think I haven’t considered it, though… the idea of being ‘addict-girl skinny’ is very attractive to me, but alas, I would probably die…and what fun would that be??!) I appreciate their willingness to open themselves up and share their lives with us, their readers – but lately, it hasn’t been feeling natural at all, but rather kind of forced.

As well, the long-famous It Happened To Me (IHTM) column has absolutely been the shits lately – just bloody awful. This column began back in the Sassy magazine days (which I long for on a regular basis, no joke) – people write in with stories of things that have happened to them (ergo the name, duh…sorry, that was a stupid explanation right there), and was always one of the highlights of Jane Pratt’s publications. However, the ones that XOJane has posted lately have been plain stupid: I Dated a Liar (really? no shit, Sherlock! we all have!! it would be far more interesting to read of someone who hadn’t dated a liar, don’t you think?), I Have Pyrotechnophobia (fear of fireworks??! who cares???!), and I Bullied My 8th Grade Teacher (Once) (ARRRGGHHHH!!!!). These are awful! Ridiculous!! And don’t even get me started on the ridiculousness of I Was The First Miss Teen Malibu…grrr. I’ve actually written two of these pieces myself but have yet to submit them – I’m a wee bit nervous about sharing them (they are quite the pair of corkers), and at the moment, I’m not even sure that I want to be associated with some of the other recent submissions (I Have Psoriasis!). I just don’t know where things have gone wrong.

 

 

It’s not all doom and gloom at XOJane - there have been a number of Beauty-related posts by writer Hannah (that’s her up there with the dark hair – she’s a doll) that have been great (note to Jane: If you are reading this, FEATURE HANNAH MORE – she’s fab!), and anything fashion-related written by Alison Freer (she’s the blonde in the pictures above) is pretty much guaranteed to be amazing (I don’t know that there is any person alive that I want to go shopping with more than Alison – maybe Salma Hayak, but…it’d be close). I don’t know if things changed when Cat Marnell left or what, but something is rotten in the state of XOJane/Denmark at the moment…and I desperately hope they fix it. These days, reading the posts by the different commenters is usually FAR more entertaining than the actual pieces themselves…and it wasn’t always that way, trust me.

On to Cat for a moment: I believe that she needed to leave XOJane – she had become a severe liability for SAY Media, and she wasn’t doing much good with the bits of work she was producing for the site. Everything out of her was drugs, drugs and more drugs – and I felt it was horribly irresponsible of those around her to continue enabling her like that. Since her departure, she has been writing a weekly column over at Vice, which is a much better home for her and her writing, but…her columns are reading like a combination of a suicide note and a train wreck. It’s sad, really…she is enormously talented, but is throwing it all away. I’ve noticed that the writers at XOJane will throw in gratuitous references to Cat in their pieces (when it doesn’t even always fit) – perhaps as a way to garner readers (since Cat Marnell is a pretty popular Internet search term these days). Whatever the reason, it seems that the tone of Jane has shifted somewhat following this Cat-gate scandal – it is my fervent hope that they can return to their past glory, and get out of this slump that they’re in at the moment. I have loved Jane Pratt and all that she’s done for nearly 25 years – I’ve written about her a million times, I’ve written to her about a billion times (sadly, she’s never responded to me directly…not even once. I’m not sure what’s wrong with what I’m sending her – too ass-kissy, perhaps? I’ll keep trying.), and I believe in her abilities and talent so much (okay, okay…I’ll admit it: I want to be her). I just want my old XOJane back….and based upon some of the incredibly honest readers comments that are popping up on the site – I’m not the only one.

xxx

PS: While you’re reading things over at Jezebel, be sure to read ANYTHING written by Lindy West…she is FANTASTIC!!! I have a ginormous girl crush on her – her talent is divine! :)

Advice For The Young At Heart

This article appeared on my beloved Jezebel this week, and I really love it. It’s full of really, REALLY good advice for graduates (if it didn’t have potty language in it, I would totally be sharing this with my soon-to-graduate Seniors). Here’s the article – give it a read:

Congrats, New Grads! By the Way, You Don’t Know Anything

It’s the time of year when the internet is deluged with condescending lists of “advice for graduates”—stuff like “experience Paris” and “learn to wear purple until you laugh until you cry until you laugh”—and since all of that shit is just literal barf smeared on a laptop screen, I decided I might as well take a stab at it myself. Let’s help some kids.

1. Experience Paris. Just kidding.
You know what? International travel is great and all, but it doesn’t magically turn you into a genius or a good person. If you make it to 30 without ever having had the financial flexibility to purchase a $1000 plane ticket, then you’re pretty much just normal—not some barefoot hill-goblin. And you know what? Everything in Paris is fucking covered in gruyere. You’re only 22-years-old (or something). Do you really want to get sick of gruyere already? Seriously. You want gruyere in your life for as long as possible.

2. This is the most important thing of all the things: you think you know stuff, but you don’t.
People act like college is this gateway to adulthood, but it’s really just more playtime. Adulthood is the gateway to adulthood. It’s not that you’re not smart, but I’m like a decade older than you and I’m STILL half baby. I only know like two things at this point, and I am literally the Albert Einstein of being in my twenties. You’re going to keep learning stuff constantly for the next 50 years or so, so just calm down and let the learning happen.

3. No one wants to hear about your semester abroad in Thailand.

4. Take all the help. Take it!
Okay, so there are no jobs, you have tons of debt, and everything is fucked. I’m sorry. If moving in with your parents for a while is a viable option, if you have the ability to ease into independence, you should take it. Otherwise, when you actually become independent, you’ll have thousands of dollars in credit card debt and a shitty rental record, and then when your car gets towed because of unpaid parking tickets you won’t be able to afford to get it out of the impound lot, which means you essentially just went into debt so that you could give away your car. These things affect your credit for years and can come back to screw you even after you’ve learned your lessons [Ed: After ten years, I'm still dealing with the effects of my just-out-of-school credit fuckery. Take this advice VERY seriously. Don't be me.]. So if you have help available to you, take it. If you can, move in with your parents and get an unpaid internship. Then get another unpaid internship. Write a blog or whatever. Get to know people in your chosen field, don’t be a presumptuous dick (nobody owes you shit), and remember that it’s your privilege (i.e. parents) that got you here. Your responsibility as a privileged person is to not be a Republican.

5. To the non-privileged people, yes, you will have to work harder than the people in item #4, and that completely sucks.
The world isn’t fair. I’m sorry. It just isn’t. But take the job you have to take, and try and do the work you love in your free time. Chances are, you’re smart and tough and not a dick. That will help.

6. You look really pretty today.

7. Say yes to everything. Take the meeting.
Any job in the field that you eventually want to get into is better than any job that’s not in that field. Pay your dues. Nothing is beneath you right now. And be shrewd. Like, if you graduate from culinary school and what you want is to be a fancy chef, it’s better to get a job as a dishwasher at a nice restaurant than as a line cook at Denny’s. I thought I wanted to be a writer, so my first unpaid internship was at a shitty fake magazine that was owned by these super sleazy Young Businessmen in the Valley. It was basically just a coupon book that kept the dudes afloat while they focused on their real project—inspirational corporate fire-walking. So mostly my “editorial internship” consisted of picking up firewood at a seedy lumber yard and driving it across town to this weird, empty porn-condo that, I guess, was Creepy Firewalking, Inc.’s HQ. Then the dudes would touch my arm and try to get me to walk on hot coals because “it’s spiritual,” and then they would give me $20 and it felt dirty. It was fucking awful, but I’m still glad I did it, because I totally got real magazine jobs later. Resumes are all smoke and mirrors anyway.

8. Be nice to your parents, because they are going to die and you will be sad.
Unless your parents were horrible, in which case fuck your parents! (Not literally.) One of the best things about being a grown-up is that you get to burn bridges with people who are complete dicks to you. You make your own family now.

9. That said, you should also never ever burn any bridges.
My dad was literally nice to everyone he ever met for his entire life, and every time shit got complicated some old rando would pop out of the dumbwaiter and be like, “Hey, do you want this job? I love you!” He called it luck, but I call it being fucking nice to people. (Just kidding, we didn’t have a dumbwaiter. But maybe you can, once you get one million jobs from being so nice all the time!)

10. You are a no-strings-attached person right now. Congrats!
This is your big chance to be responsibly poor, before your poverty starts fucking up anyone else’s life. You (probably) don’t have kids, a spouse, a mortgage, or responsibilities of any kind. What you do have is the stamina and the drive to cope with a staggering amount of discomfort (i.e. an air mattress in a windowless closet in a garbage shack under the freeway with 13 vegan roommates growing white-people dreads) in the name of freedom (i.e. an unpaid internship supplemented only by your busking salary and plasma sales). Do it now. Because believe me, by the time you’re 30, you won’t even have the patience to sleep on a fucking couch, let alone share a microwave that smells like the ghost of Braden’s ravioli.

11. Don’t get confused, though: Unless you are actually poor, you are not actually poor.
I know I said “poor” in item #10, but I was being lazy. I’m sorry. What I really meant was “broke.” Don’t get some chip on your shoulder about how disenfranchised you are because all you have is a liberal arts degree and 100 Top Ramens. It will make you sound silly and careless. Some people have been systemically disadvantaged their entire lives and now they live in their cars and don’t even have Bottom Ramen. Here’s an easy way to tell the difference: If you got arrested, do you have someone that could bail you out of jail? If the answer is yes, then you are broke and not poor. “Poor” is not a game. You are “broke.”

12. You should care about politics.
Unless you care about politics too much, in which case please stop caring about politics so much because you’re making everyone tired.

13. Invest in potatoes.
Potatoes are delicious and they cost almost negative money. Any idiot can cook a potato, and if you’re following this guide, there’s a good chance you’re going to be very hungry for a very long time. Potatoes!

14. If you must make art about your own life, go for it.
But don’t expect anyone to take you seriously until your life actually has stuff in it.

15. Don’t believe anything that someone sitting at a folding table on the street tells you.
They are either a weird monk who wants to give you a “free book” for $15, or they think 9/11 was an inside job, or they want you to sign up for a garbage credit card, or they are Lyndon LaRouche.

16. Your time as a libertarian, Buddhist, and/or bisexual is over.
Unless you’re an actual bisexual, in which case I TOTALLY BELIEVE IN YOU. PLEASE DON’T YELL AT ME. I know a lot of you guys are mad at me right now. Shit. I feel like I’m breaking my own rule at #9. But I told you, I’m still learning! (See half-baby, item #2.) And also, libertarians are mean. I am not sorry for that part.

17. It’s time to figure out your weird sex stuff.
I know that when you were younger you hated yourself for liking anything besides tender vanilla caresses, but hush. If you can only self-lubricate by imagining that your mattress is stuffed with Michael Landon’s hair, embrace it! And remember that there is someone on the internet who has an actual mattress stuffed with Michael Landon’s actual hair, so you are not even close to being the creepiest Cheerio in the box. Also, if you really just like tender vanilla caresses, that’s adorable! Do that! Don’t let anyone tell you what to do with your parts.

18. None of the stuff that you think is a big deal is a big deal.
Like, nobody on the entire earth cares if you got your period and stained your pants. Fuck, nobody even cares if you just SHIT your pants. Just go home and change your stupid pants! People have bills to pay! People are busy! No one is looking at you!

19. Don’t structure your life based on lists on the internet.
That’s crazy. You do you, special snowflake.

Author Lindy West does a great job of sharing solid advice for those embarking on their journey into the “real” world (whatever that is). I would like to add a few things (I know, I know…I’m damn sure that I’m probably such a hot mess that I ought not be in any position to be giving advice, but…since when do I ever do what I ought to do??!) Here’s a few things I would like to add:

1. Be confident…but don’t be full of yourself. There is nothing wrong at all with believing in yourself and being proud of your accomplishments, but you DO NOT have to go around telling everybody how awesome/independent/talented/responsible/freakin’ awesome you are. If you are these things, the rest of the world will notice. Case in point: Aubrey O’Day’s hideously obnoxious behavior on NBC’s “Celebrity Apprentice”. If you haven’t been watching this season, she has acted like such a spoiled brat, and a real horse’s ass – she bragged about how creative she was, how talented/hardworking/magnificent, etc etc, blah blah…and it was ridiculous. We have two ears and one mouth: we should listen twice as often as we talk, it’s as simple as that. If you are doing your best and accomplishing your goals, people around you will notice. I promise. (NOTE: be damn careful who you shit talk and where…it may come back to haunt you)

2. Be careful whose toes you step on today, for they might be attached to the ass you have to kiss tomorrow. It’s great to be ambitious, to have goals and dreams and do what you need to do to achieve them, but you have to be a nice person while you’re doing that. You don’t need to be an asshole to those around you that you fear may be standing in “your” way to the top…they are just doing their thing, and you need to just do yours. You never know when you may need those people to work with you again, so being a jackass isn’t going to help anyone (plus it’ll give you a seriously shitty reputation, which will be hard to overcome). This has been a lesson that I’ve learned the hard way – not because I have intentionally been an asshole to someone (that’s not how I roll), but in a previous position, I asserted myself and stood up for what I thought was right. That act (something which in a lot of places would have won me praise) has cost me nearly everything. The person that I pissed off has gone so far out of her way to damage my career that I frankly don’t know how long it’s going to take me to get past that…or if I ever will. I don’t regret standing up for what was right and doing my best for one second, but I do regret that I wasn’t more tactful about it. I was raised in an environment where what you knew/your experience and skills got you the jobs you wanted; here it’s who you know, not what you know. I inadvertently screwed myself over pretty badly – so if you listen to anything I’ve said….listen to this one. Please.

3. Finally…If you don’t like how things are, change it! You’re not a tree. (Jim Rohn) This is something that I struggle with every day…and I wish I didn’t. I need to work on changing those things that make me unhappy, and be more proactive in my life…and you can, too. We don’t have to stay where we are if we don’t want to, and we don’t have to keep doing what we don’t really want to do. The entire world is our oyster, and we have the ability and the freedom to do anything or go anywhere we want. So, in the spirit of Nike….JUST DO IT.

Wherever you are in your life, whether you’re just starting out or you’re further along the path, I wish you the absolute and very best. Do all that you want, be all that you want, and…shine, baby…SHINE :)

xxx


Hats Off!

One of the very best things about weddings in England is the hats, and yesterday’s Royal Wedding brought out some AMAZING headwear!! Check out this gallery (the pictures come from my beloved Jezebel):

Princess Beatrice wore this awesome lid:

Her sister Princess Eugenie had this one on:

Princess Michael of Kent had on this gigantic chapeau:

Lady Helen Taylor went the floral route (I loved this one!):

Queen Margrethe II of Denmark is bringing the silly with this one…isn’t it cool?

I am DYING for this black hat that Zara Phillips was sporting…DYING!!!

Prince Edward’s wife Sophie, Countess of Wessex is wearing this interesting one – it’s equal parts antler, tree branch and fabulous! :)

Sophie Winkleman, Lady Frederick Windsor’s hat is FANTASTIC:

Miriam Gonzalez nearly stole the show in this hat (and her whole look, actually)…love love LOVE it!

Princess Anne is rocking a certain kind of something with this look:

Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, had on one seriously large lid:

Catherine Middleton’s mother Carole looked exquisite – the color was PERFECT for her:

Tara Palmer-Tomkinson and her sister Santa Montefiore  had on some serious statement-making headwear:

Victoria Beckham looked fantastic (what else is new?) from tip to toe…and that accessory/man on the end of her arm looked AMAZING (he is so handsome that it ought to be illegal):

Don’t you just love them all???!  I wish wearing hats was the thing to do over here…perhaps if I start showing up everywhere with a snazzy lid the trend will catch on. What do you think? ;)

xxx

Total Eclipse of the Heart (& Other Great ’80s Tunes)

This was posted on Jezebel yesterday, and I can’t stop laughing at it – take a look:

A Visual Map Of "Total Eclipse Of The Heart"

Isn’t that hilarious?  Some of the amazing people who comment on Jezebel posted a couple of other good ones:

Seeing all of these has made me think of great songs from ‘back in the day’ – I’ve posted many of my old favorites in the past, and I think it’s time I trot out a few more for your listening pleasure. Sit back, relax, and prepare to be dazzled… ;)

First up: Deee-Lite’s “Groove is in the Heart” (my 4 year old is currently obsessed with this song – how awesome is that kid’s taste?!?!?!) (I’m aware that I’ve posted this one before, but…a person can never have too much Groove in their Heart! ;)  ):

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4D1HSL7P98&safety_mode=true&persist_safety_mode=1]

Next…it’s time we Stop! Collaborate and listen! You got it…I’m talking “Ice Ice Baby”!!  Every time I hear this damn song I have to stop what I’m doing and commence a round of vigorous dancing! :)  Enjoy! :)

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rog8ou-ZepE&ob=av2el&safety_mode=true&persist_safety_mode=1]

Ready for one more??!  How about this little gem:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lfBdGT4dn4E&ob=av2nl]

That’s Stacey Q’s song “Two of Hearts” – I STILL love this one, and I will admit that a couple moves were busted as I listened to it just now…it’s THAT great!! :)  (As an aside – do you remember when she appeared in an episode of “Facts of Life” playing a character named Cinnamon? Here’s a link ! )

Finally…the grand daddy of all great ’80s videos – A-Ha’s “Take On Me” – this one STILL gets me every time:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djV11Xbc914&ob=av2nl&safety_mode=true&persist_safety_mode=1]

Great, right?!  Hope you’re having a smashing good day – Happy Wednesday, friends! :)

xxx