Dream On

I subscribe to the daily newsletter from the website Lifehacker, and I kinda love it. There’s usually something in it that speaks to me – but today’s newsletter was more of a holler than a whisper. Behold the post ‘9 Steps To Stop Dreaming And Start Doing’ – I LOVE it!!! :-)

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Having a dream and being a dreamer are two different mindsets. Dreamers are drifters just floating through life with no real plans. One who has a dream, is a doer on the path towards achieving their goal.

Once you decide to remove your head from the clouds, tackle the obstacles that face you, and organize a plan of attack, you become a doer. If you are ready to put in the work, here are 9 steps to stop dreaming and start doing.

1. Accept responsibility for your own actions

“Start where you are. Use what you have. Do what you can.” -Arthur Ashe

It is the most unattractive thing to hear someone constantly whine and complain about their life. Especially when they blame the world for their problems. The whole universe is probably against you, does not care about you, and will deceive you. This does not make any actions, or lack there of, on your behalf their fault. Say this statement out loud, “I am in control of my behavior and choose how to react to circumstances.” Say it everyday. Nothing is more true than that statement.

You can, and need, to start actively controlling your thoughts and emotions. Learn to control your rage when you are angry. When a negative thought slips in, push it right back out. This takes practice because we have been programmed by our environment to behave and think in certain ways. Fight to change your negativity, or you will remain a bitter and miserable person. Use your aggression in a positive way by working out, or put it into your work.

2. Give and receive love and forgiveness

“Learn how to fill your day with POSITIVITY. Think of how your ideas CAN work, not how it won’t work.” -Steve Harvey

Once you harness your inner power of controlling your thoughts and emotions, it is time to start focusing on positivity. The best way to start is by accepting others and forgiving the people who have caused you pain. Giving love and forgiveness really isn’t about giving at all. It is about you healing by letting go of negative relationships. If these people really love and care about you, they will fight for you. If you walk away and never hear from them again, you know they never cared, so why should you? Your grudges make you focus on people who do not deserve your time or attention. Anger leaves you feeling irrational, depressed, deceived, sad, regretful, and lonely. Learning to truly forgive those who hurt you will lift a thousand pounds of burden off your shoulders. You will free your mind and be able to start working on your dream.

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3. Accept yourself

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” -Eleanor Roosevelt

Now that you are focusing on living a positive life, it is time to look in the mirror and love what you see. Physically and mentally. No one is perfect. It is time to accept that you will never be what society expects you to be. Follow your intuitions. Do not let someone else dictate your life. That only leads to a boring, predictable, miserable, and mediocre life. Do what makes you happy instead of just dreaming about it. Love yourself flaws and all.

4. Choose who you surround yourself with wisely

“We met for a reason, either you’re a blessing or a lesson.” -LoveQuotesPlus.com

This journey will end many relationships in your life. The people who are not supportive, who are negative, and who use you need to go! At first you may feel lonely and insecure. If you focus on you instead of them, these feelings will go away. It is time to move on. It is time to let go. The ones who truly care about you, respect you, and accept you for who you really are will stay. They will support you throughout your journey. These relationships will become more valuable to you than ever before. If you have given your all to a relationship, and they do not give back, stop chasing after them the next time they leave. You will thank yourself in the long run.

5. Learn to ignore the negativity from others

“I don’t know what the key to success is, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone.” -Bill Cosby

Now that you are starting on your journey, you will have people who will try their best to pull you down. That’s why the steps above are necessary to complete before starting. If you have prepared yourself for the haters, you will be able to rise above. It is easier to criticize others than work on yourself. Knowing this gives you peace about where you are in life and where they are. You are obviously ahead, even if it doesn’t look like it to others. Keep moving on and let them talk.

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6. Carefully lay out your plans

“Failure is not the opposite of success, inaction is.” -Rois Liano

Freeing your mind from your emotional baggage gives you room to focus on your dreams. Now that you have a clear picture, it is time to take action. To be a doer, you need a game plan. Write your end goal at the top of a sheet of paper. Below, write out the steps you plan to take to get there in an organized, realistic fashion. Say your goal is to become a nurse. Your first step should probably be volunteering at your local hospital to see if you would really enjoy it. Next maybe list the schools you are interested in applying to. The third step could be to gather your necessary paperwork to apply to colleges. See what I am doing here? The sum of all the little tasks you do equals your goal. Lay it out in daily, weekly, monthly tasks that will get you closer to your dream.

7. Do SOMETHING, ANYTHING

“Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it.” -Henry David Thoreau

Many people will get to step 6 and stop. Your plan does not come to fruition magically. You have to now take action to get yourself there. So start researching, traveling, volunteering, writing, calling, interviewing, working out, or whatever opportunity you can find to get you moving forward. You may have to take on many different hats to get you there. Start where you can, do whatever you can, this is where the physical work begins.

8. Embrace failures and detours along the way

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” -Thomas Edison

We all have epic failures in life. It is time to stop viewing these failures as an end all. Failure is an inevitable part of success. Ask any highly successful person if they’ve ever failed, and they will tell you they have 100 times. Failure only means to try a different way. Start viewing failures as a positive experience. How can we learn without failing? Failures result from trying. People who avoid failures at all costs are content with a mediocre life. We are not these people. We want true happiness and inner peace. I remember going to work in a past career and absolutely dreading it. I now think about work and feel peaceful and happy. It’s still hard work, it’s just work that I am passionate about.

As you begin the journey of pursuing your dream, it may change a little, or a lot, along the way. Your passion is already programmed inside you. Uncover your God-given gift through this process and keep moving forward no matter what may come.

DreamMeaningDreamInterpretation

9. Network and use resources to your advantage

“Opportunities don’t happen. You create them.” -Chris Grosser

You will realize, eventually, that you need others to help you get to your goal. Whether it is in absorbing information and experience from them, or getting recognized for your talent. Look online for good informative websites, look for classes or lectures where you can learn and connect with others. Drop the pride and shamelessly promote yourself with your work and/or knowledge. Whatever you can find, whoever will help, take it seriously. Opening one door can lead to many more opportunities.

Start at step one. Do not pass go and do not collect $200. If you commit to these 9 steps to stop dreaming and start doing, you are facing your fears head on and taking a leap of faith. Congratulations, your life will now truly begin. Please note this will be hard and sometimes not fun. Stay focused, but don’t forget to take time to clear your mind and relax along the way. I hope you now feel inspired to step out of your comfort zone, and risk being happy.

“Dreams are like floating down a lazy river. The path to success is like riding a roller coaster. Find the courage to get on the roller coaster, and stay on the ride until you puke.” -Margaux Daughtry

 

Don’t you just LOVE this???! I absolutely do – there are so many good steps there to help guide us along the path. I’m a doer in life, no ifs ands or buts about it. I like to do things, and once I get a notion in me wee noggin, I’m off and running. This usually serves me well – but not always. There have been more than my share of disasters, but I keep on trying. :)  I really love #4, #5, and #6 in particular – let me tell you why. #4 urges you to carefully choose who you surround yourself with…and this is one that I am FINALLY learning. I used to love everybody, see the best in everybody, and be such a bloody Pollyanna that it wasn’t even funny. People would take advantage of me right, left, and center – and you know why? Because I let them. There are people who only know me when they want something (ie: borrow money or ask me to drive them somewhere) – I don’t need that kind of crap and negativity…and neither do you, my dear. Surround yourself with people who think you are the cats pyjamas – it’ll make you feel great! :)

I think #5 is awesome advice, too – and something that I have become REALLY good at lately. I hear all sorts of misery and negativity in a day – and I ignore it. All of it. What other people think of me is NONE of my business – don’t know, don’t care. I seem to find myself surrounded by people who whine and complain all the bloody time about their lives – I’m not interested in hearing it. I know that makes me sound like a real heartless bitch, but I promise that I’m not. When people are having a hard time, I am the first person to show up, casserole in hand, offering to help. However, when people aren’t interested in helping themselves and only want to play the victim – I’m out. I’ve zero interest in that kind of nonsense – life is too damn short!

Finally, #6 is a great idea – write down what you want. Put the words in front of you, on paper – it makes them real, and gives you power to make it happen. I am crazy about creating a list of manageable steps that will help you achieve that dream – I’ve been doing this for a couple of decades now, and this practice has served me verrrrrrrry well. There’ve been times when I’ve had to adjust the steps and make them even smaller and more specific, but I’ve achieved what I was after eventually. SUCH a good strategy! :)

 

I used to work with a lady whose job it was to work with high school seniors and coach them through the college application process – something SUPER important. She had the most amazing gift of walking the line between fostering the wildest dreams of students and keeping their expectations real and manageable. I’ve asked her about that many times, and she says that it’s so important to temper one’s dreams and passions with a bit of reality, but still keep the dream burning and alive because, well….you just never know. Isn’t that magical? You just never know. :) I love it. :)

xxx

Sophia – Part Deux :)

Welcome to the second installment in the Sophia series – I introduced it last week, but here’s the overview again in case you missed it:

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Think of someone you admire — a talented artist or scientist, entrepreneur or adventurer.

Do you know what their great regret in life is? What advice would they share about parenting, or aging, or finding fulfillment? What book has had the greatest impact on their life?

Chances are you don’t know. Which is why we’ve created Sophia, a project to collect life lessons from fascinating people.

Here’s how it works. We’re conducting hundreds of long-form interviews with accomplished individuals, asking them to share stories and advice about topics that are central to a well-lived life — happiness, relationships, aging, work, parenting, habits and routines, to name a few. We’ll publish these personal conversations on HuffPost, and we’ll also use the lessons our guests share to build a special platform (think of it as ‘Yelp for wisdom’) that organizes their collective insights by topic.

In the coming weeks we’ll feature life lessons from Nobel and Pulitzer Prize winners, successful executives, engineers, authors and athletes, dynamic thinkers and doers of all stripes. If you want their practical wisdom delivered straight to you, follow Sophia on Facebook or subscribe to our email newsletter.

The heart of this project is the set of questions we pose to each guest. Some of the questions elicit weighty responses, i.e., Have you had any recent realizations about living a rewarding life?

Other questions are more practical, i.e., What’s the greatest travel journey you’ve taken that you’d recommend to others? What’s the most meaningful gift you’ve received?

Each individual’s answers are personal and unique, but they are all also broadly useful. So follow or subscribe for lessons, ideas and insights you can apply to your own life. Get in touch with us at sophia [at] huffingtonpost.com; we read every note. Also, we’re always on the lookout for new guests. If you have suggestions, including someone wise and insightful in your own life, let us know.

 

I posted my responses to the first section last week, and now I’m about to tackle the second section…but I’m not sure I have any business whatsoever sharing my ideas on this topic – it’s ‘Love and Relationships’, something I am TERRIBLE at, sadly. I’m not going to be able to answer all of the questions, but I will post them all here for you to think about. Let’s have a go at it, shall we? :-)

 

Love and relationships:

  • What advice would you give your younger self about finding love and building lasting relationships? I would tell my younger self to stop looking for love, to stop feeling like I always had to be in a relationship, and to learn early in life to be comfortable with myself and who I am. I would tell myself that the bullshit lies and propaganda that my mother tried to drill into my head (you must have a man, without a man you’re worthless, you need a man to take care of you, etc etc etc – no lie, this is what I was raised hearing…is it any wonder I’ve been so messed up??!) was just that – bullshit lies and propaganda. I would tell myself to focus on my career, my education, and being happy with myself rather than fretting about the dude du jour. SUCH an idiot. I would also urge myself to be more patient with relationships, to quit rushing through life like I’m running a sprint (and I don’t run)…and just relax a little bit. 
  • Did you learn anything from your earliest relationships? I did learn a lot from those relationships….mainly what I didn’t want! There’s something so sweet and innocent about the person that I was back then, and I miss her….sadly, all of the events that have transpired have changed me from that wide-eyed optimist to the more-than-a-little-jaded sea hag that I am now, and all of it has been my own fault. I would love to be able to blame someone else (and there have been contributors), but ultimately it’s my own fault. This is a hard pill to swallow, but..c’est la vie. All I can do is learn from my mistakes and try to avoid making them again in the future (unless they are a really fun mistake…then I might make sure I’m a slow learner ;-) ).
  • What’s the best gift you’ve ever received from/given to a partner or close friend? This is a tough one…I’ve received a lot of wonderful gifts over the years!! One that’s really memorable was from my first serious boyfriend – after we broke up. My 18th birthday was a few weeks after we decided (very amicably) to go our separate ways, and he showed up to my house on my birthday morning with two presents: a bottle of lemon gin (a running joke between us after he fed lemon gin to my cat on my 17th birthday), and a bottle of Calvin Klein Eternity perfume. To this day, I love the smell of Eternity, and I think of him every single time I smell that fragrance, and the memories are always good. :-) I’ve been given lots and lots of wonderful things by my friends, my family, and my loved ones over the years…so, I’m a lucky girl. :-)
  • Do you have any lessons for best approaching love and relationships when you’re single? Oh, Christ….I have absolutely no business answering this one! I have done pretty much everything wrong, I have made every mistake that I could make (and probably your share of screw ups, too)…but I think I deserve a bit of credit for not giving up. I know that people talk badly about me, they make fun of me for the poor relationship track record that I have (a few have even done it to my face, which I give them credit for)…but whatever. It’s all good. I can take solace in the fact that I’ve made my way through this world with my heart on my sleeve, doing what I thought was best in the moment…and I’ve had one hell of a great time, which has to count for something. :-) I wish I could have made better choices, put me and my needs first instead of always bowing to the needs of whoever I was in a relationship with – I should have dated myself, I think. It’d probably have turned out much differently for me. :-) I think that’s the best advice to a single girl that I can give – date yourself. Focus on yourself first….everything else will come in time. Put yourself out there, try new things, see new places, and say YES as often as possible. Be open, be available, and be ready – you never know what’s waiting for you. :-)
  • What advice would you have given yourself on the day you were married? I’m not touching the next five questions with a ten foot pole….no way. There’s very little insight I have on this part of the puzzle, sadly – but if I ever figure it all out, I will come back and tell you. I promise. :-)
    How did you/your spouse propose? N/A
    When did you decide that you were ready to marry your spouse? N/A
    What advice would you give to couples for keeping their relationship healthy after having children? [How did you adjust your marriage after having children?] N/A
    (If partner has died) Do you have any advice for dealing with the loss of your partner? N/A

    This was written on the wall of a bathroom in my favorite restaurant in New York - and my initials are LY. I'd love to know who wrote it!!! :-)

    This was written on the wall of a bathroom in my favorite restaurant in New York – and my initials are LY. I’d love to know who wrote it!!! :-)

This section was a killer! I am so bad at relationships – not just romantic ones, but platonic ones as well. I don’t think I’m as good a friend as I should be, and I really need to work on that. I need to find a better balance between my work life, my family life with the Wee One, and my friendships. Hopefully someday I will find the magic formula….until then, I’ll just keep trying. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming…. :-)

 

xxx

Brave

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What does it mean to you to be brave? Is it taming a lion with nothing but a feather duster and some Juicy Fruit gum? How about resisting the urge to eat all of the Ben & Jerry’s in one sitting? ( that is brave, if you ask me) I think there are lots of things that people do everyday that are incredibly brave – for some, just getting out of bed and managing to put one foot in front of the other and heading out into the world is an act of tremendous courage. We all have our own battles – some of us struggle more than others, but we all endure things that challenge our faith, our beliefs, and our sense of self. This is something that has come up in my world lately – I feel like things are going on around me (and involving me, inadvertently) that really go against who I am and what I stand for, and I’m left looking for a way to step away, out of the fire, and just get back to what is important to me. I’ve spoken before of my desire to simplify my life as much as possible, and so far this process is going okay. I’m also making a conscious effort to get the hell out of the way when I see stupidity and drama unfolding before me, whereas in the past I would step right into the fray in an attempt to help keep the peace. Stupid. I may be the sister of a peace-keeping Mountie, but I am not one myself. I really need to learn my place in this world. :(

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Anyway, something really awesome landed in my Inbox today – I receive daily emails from super-fab person Danielle LaPorte (if you aren’t familiar with her, do yourself a favor and seek her out – her attitude about stuff is AMAZING!! Plus she’s Canadian, so you know that she’s good people.), and the one today was a whopper! :) Here it is:

Want more and be kind… and 10 other points on success.

 1. Want more*. (Inner peace, greater clarity, outer beauty, awesome stuff — want anything you want.)

 2. Have an idea, or two or three, about how to get more. Act on that idea over and over again.

 3. Hang out with people you can easily adore, or at least respect.

4. Be kind. No matter what. (You can be kind and strong. You will need to be strong.)

5. Stand up for yourself. (Some people will take this personally. It’s okay.) 

6. Tell people what you’re doing that’s working. (This is optional, but it helps.)

7. Keep slaying what’s not working. (“Thank you and goodbye, I’m focused on incredible.”)

8. Have a party when you get what you want. (Kitchen disco. Close your eyes and smile. Throw a global launch extravaganza. Nap. Eat cake.)

9. Let gratitude ooze out of your pores. Be utterly dripping with Thank Yous.

 10. Share what you just got with others.

 11. Keep wanting more.

 * Want it with all your heart.

 

Don’t you love that??! I do – massively. We all need to be more kind, we need to let gratitude ooze out of us (I love the way she words that like you wouldn’t believe)…and we need to share our good fortune and celebrate the ever-loving crap out of it. There’s so much misery that’s going on in this world these days (turn on the news if you don’t believe me….it’s heartbreaking the things that go on around us), but there are good things, too. They deserve to be celebrated. :) It’s important to surround yourself with people who make you happy, for life is too short to be miserable because of someone else, don’t you think? :)

I hope that you will take a moment today to think about what you want more of in your life – love, happiness, friendship, Ben & Jerry’s (apparently I’m going to need to hit the grocery store on the way home today….I’m hungry for ice cream!), whatever it is….and start creating a plan on how you can make that happen for you. I can’t wait to hear how it goes! :)

xxx

 

Thinking Out Loud – Repost

I originally posted this last September, but wanted to share it again today. This world desperately needs more love…especially the good kind, like this:

 

This is how people should feel about each other when they are in love:

Click video to hear this song performed live

When your legs don’t work like they used to before
And I can’t sweep you off of your feet
Will your mouth still remember the taste of my love?
Will your eyes still smile from your cheeks?

And, darling, I will be loving you ’til we’re 70
And, baby, my heart could still fall as hard at 23
And I’m thinking ’bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways
Maybe just the touch of a hand
Well, me—I fall in love with you every single day
And I just wanna tell you I am

So honey now
Take me into your loving arms
Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars
Place your head on my beating heart
I’m thinking out loud
That maybe we found love right where we are

When my hair’s all but gone and my memory fades
And the crowds don’t remember my name
When my hands don’t play the strings the same way
I know you will still love me the same

‘Cause honey your soul could never grow old, it’s evergreen
And, baby, your smile’s forever in my mind and memory
I’m thinking ’bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways
Maybe it’s all part of a plan
Well, I’ll just keep on making the same mistakes
Hoping that you’ll understand

But, baby, now
Take me into your loving arms
Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars
Place your head on my beating heart
Thinking out loud
That maybe we found love right where we are

So, baby, now
Take me into your loving arms
Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars
Oh, darling, place your head on my beating heart
I’m thinking out loud
That maybe we found love right where we are
Oh, baby, we found love right where we are
And we found love right where we are 

 

 

Don’t you just love this song? Me, too…”kiss me under the light of a thousand stars / place your head on my beating heart”? Come on…that’s magic, that is. Love. :-)

I hope you’re finding love right where you are. :-)

 

xxx

The Edge of Glory

While driving home just now, I happened across a replay of Lady Gaga singing “Gypsy” live on the Howard Stern show. I damn near had to pull over as I find this performance so bloody touching it’s not even funny….my eyes fill up with moisture, my heart feels all weird and fuzzy, it just kills me. Kills. Me. Here it is – I hope you enjoy it, too :-)

Click on the image to link to the performance:-)

Click on the image to link to the performance:-)

 

image
Thought that I would be alone forever
But I won’t be tonight
I’m a man without a home
But I think with you I can spend my life
And you’ll be my little gypsy princess
Pack your bags and we can chase the sunset
Bust the rearview and fire up the jets
‘Cause it’s you and me
Baby, for life

 

Gorgeous, eh? Love.  ❤️❤️❤️

 

Xxx

Reflection

It’s Friday now, which means back to work on Monday. While I’ve not done anything terribly big or exciting this week, I do believe that what I’ve done was precisely what I needed – I spent a lot of time at home (which was glorious), I smothered my child with love, hugs and kisses (which is guaranteed to cure almost anything that ails you), and I took time to reflect on some things that have been weighing heavily on my mind recently. For starters, I’m meant to be having arm surgery in December, and I’ve decided not to go ahead with it for now. This operation has been on the books since the summer, but I’ve kept putting it off and putting it off…which is so unlike me. I have such an awful feeling about the whole damn thing – I think about it, I start to panic, my breathing quickens, and I break out in a cold sweat. It’s stupid. I’ve endured 14 operations on my arm (14!!!!), as well as three other surgical procedures, so I should be cool with the whole process. But I’m not, not even a little bit. On Monday night, I woke up at 2:10am, hyperventilating about the whole thing, and I never made it back to sleep. I was overwhelmed with feelings of fear, and dread…and it’s just not worth it. I will suck it up and deal with the pain that I suffer from every day, and get the work done when I just can’t take it anymore. Maybe I will feel better about it then – but for now, it’s a no go. Once I came to that conclusion on Tuesday, I felt considerably better, and the rest of the week has passed with somewhat less stress. Bonus!

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Ive been considering a number of other things, as well. I know that I’m a bit of a pain in the ass as far as it goes – I always quote Mindy Kaling when I say, “I’m a handful, I’m not for everyone”. However, I’m learning (at the ripe old age of 40) that my days of settling and accepting things that I’m not comfortable with are done. I have quit saying yes to things that I don’t want to do, and I am actively working on not spending time with people whose company I don’t particularly enjoy. I have noticed lately how very ill-mannered some people around me are – and, while in the past I may have turned a blind eye and just ignored it – I’m done with that, too. I don’t wish to spend time around people who can’t be polite and gracious – not interested. Instead, I want to surround myself with people I enjoy, people with whom I have common interests, and enjoy some good, solid conversation. I don’t want to work so hard on relationships with people around me anymore – life is a two way street, it’s not all me and my efforts. I know that, as a natural planner, I often tend to take the lead with people, but I don’t want to do that anymore. It’s annoying, frankly. I hsve spent most of my adult working life telling kids (and adults) what to do – I don’t want to social direct the lives of people around me. Screw that. It’s time for a more laid back approach – I can’t wait to give it a try! :-)

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This man has got it figured out. ❤️❤️❤️

 

Anyway, I’m planning to enjoy my final few days at home – run a few errands, take care of some stuff around here, and get myself ready for the three week sprint to Christmas vacation. I’m going to continue my couch sitting/movie watching binge that’s been going on all week (and it’s been bloody fantastic), and I’m going to nap like it was an Olympic sport and I’m going for the gold.

It’s going to be GREAT. :-)

 

xxx

 

Broken

The funk continues. I think something has broken inside of me – I want to stay home, I don’t want to see anyone or talk to anyone (apart from the Wee One)…I just want the world to go away. This is certainly not the norm for me, I’m usually super social – but I’ve got a serious case of the Rhett Butlers: Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn. About much. Ugh.

This time hibernating at home has given me some happiness, though – I found a few things online that warmed my increasingly cynical heart:

1) The microphone died at a Toronto Maple Leafs game the other night as the singer sang the American national anthem – not to fear, though, the Canadian fans stepped up and sang along. Nice. :-)

Click on the picture to see the video! :-)

Click on the picture to see the video! :-)

 

2) A teacher in New Jersey set the world record for most pull-ups (chin ups) in a 24 hour period…and he did it to raise money for cancer research in the name of a former student of his who passed away from the disease. If that isn’t the most awesome, hard core thing – love it! :-)

So. Awesome. Click the picture to visit an article with the full story :-)

So. Awesome. Click the picture to visit an article with the full story :-)

 

3) A bunch of pictures that have been sent from the picture heavens to make me feel better. I think. I hope.

This.

This.

Dolly is my spirit animal.

Dolly is my spirit animal.

Love this :-)

Love this :-)

I need to learn this

I need to learn this

 

4) In-n-Out Burger finally opened in San Antonio on Thursday – and I could not be happier. I love In-n-Out, and have been going nuts waiting for their arrival here….imagine my joy to find that their first location is a three minute drive from my work!! This will undoubtedly mean bad things for my already-wide arse, but….who gives a shit? Life is too short to miss out on even one Double Double Animal Style! :-) A really cool thing happened on Thursday – my secretary and I were chattering about our excitement for the grand opening, and a parent who was dropping stuff at school for his daughter heard us. He returned to the office 45 minutes later with a bag of burgers for all of us in the office – how AMAZINGLY kind is that??! I am still blown away by such kindness, and can’t believe that I was not only the witness to such a gesture, but the recipient. Mind blown….heart full.

Good people do exist :-)

Good people do exist :-)

Love love LOVE  ❤️❤️❤️

Love love LOVE ❤️❤️❤️

 

I’m not entirely sure what it’s going to take to get me out of this ditch that I’m wallowing in…and I’ve no idea how long it is going to take. I just know that I feel like a ball of exposed nerves, everything rubs me the wrong way – and I’m not exactly fit for human consumption. I feel like I exist for others to take advantage of, and that I give and give and give – and get nothing in return. I’m sure that I should be okay with that – but I’m just not. :( On Friday night, I went to see the movie “The Theory of Everything” starring the brilliant Eddie Redmayne as Stephen Hawking. His performance was mind-blowing – and the story was pretty great, if perhaps a smidge too sweet. It’s hard to even imagine the triumph of the human spirit as shown in that film, and the story of Stephen and his wife – and what she did for him and their family – is nothing short of incredible. I hope that you’ll go and see this movie – it’s wonderful. :) I doubt that I could be as graceful as Jane under such circumstances!!

I’m off work this week, and all I have planned is cooking Thanksgiving dinner for my family, and a few get-togethers with friends (provided I can tear myself from the couch). I plan to spend the rest of my time plowing through good TV and movies, drinking some Beaujolais Nouveau (or Tito’s Vodka – my heart belongs to Tito’s), and just enjoying the peace and quiet of my home. Perhaps this time will be just what I need to heal me, and help me glue the pieces of me back together. I just need to get a broom and a dustpan and sweep them all off the floor – now, where’s the Crazy Glue?

 

xxx

 

 

 

Islands in the Stream

I remember when Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton were all the rage in the ’80s. I’m a longtime worshipper at the temple of Dolly (who isn’t?), but I was never much of a Kenny fan (my mom was, though…she even had a poster of him on the inside of her closet door in her bedroom – so. weird. ) One of my friends from home and I used to giggle and sing “Islands in the Stream” when anyone with boobs (ie: she and I) would swim backstroke in the local pool. Get it? Boobs? Islands? I know. Lame. :-(

Dolly = Perfection :)

Dolly = Perfection :)

Anyway….although I’ve always known all of the words to sing along (because the bloody ditty was EVERYWHERE), I never stopped to listen to them. Until yesterday. Let’s take a look, shall we?

You do something to me
That I can’t explain
Hold me closer and I feel no pain
Every beat of my heart
We got something going on
Tender love is blind
It requires a dedication
All this love we feel
Needs no conversation
We can ride it together, ah-ha
Making love with each other, ah-ha

Islands in the stream
That is what we are
No one in between
How can we be wrong
Sail away with me
To another world
And we rely on each other, ah-ha
From one lover to another, ah-ha

I can’t live without you
If the love was gone
Everything is nothing
If you got no one
And you did walk in the night
Slowly losing sight of the real thing

But that won’t happen to us
And we got no doubt
Too deep in love and we got no way out
And the message is clear
This could be the year for the real thing

No more will you cry
Baby, I will hurt you never

We start and end as one
In love forever
We can ride it together, ah-ha
Making love with each other, ah-ha

 

Lovely, don’t you think? I kind of love the words and the ideas presented…I wish someone felt that way about me!! It reminds me of this article that some friends posted online recently (women friends hinting at their husbands) entitled Ten Things To Do For Your Wife Every Year:

When your words and actions are intentional, the hope of a better marriage becomes reality. Here are 10 things to do for your wife every year.

Take a trip alone with her.

Make a big deal about her birthday.

Give her a weekend away.

Get dressed up (suit and tie) and take her on a date.

Pray continually for her and with her.

Take her to the place of your first date.

Give her a week off from “mom duties.”

Take her to a show.

Write a love letter to her.

Give her a head to toe massage without expecting anything.

 

The Best :)

The Best :)

Can you imagine??? I know. Me, neither. I know women, though, who are treated this way monthly….it seems like a fairy tale to me! ;-) Can you imagine….a man in a suit and tie and nobody died??! I love it!! Somebody taking you to a show without you having to book the tickets and make all the arrangements??! That’s bloody magic, that’s what that is!! Crazy town!! I just think that when people try and do anything for those around them to show that they care…it’s pure magic, whether it’s a grand gesture or not. Doing things to make others happy and feel good is one of the best things we can selfishly do for ourselves as well….and we all ought to try it more often. :-) Who knows, friends….2015 is coming quickly, and perhaps with this new year will come a bunch of great things for all of us! Like Kenny and Dolly sang….This could be the year for the real thing. :-)

 

xxx

 

 

 

 

How To Get The Girl

On her new album ‘1989’, Taylor Swift has a song called ‘How to Get the Girl’…I love this idea of a how-to list on how to be with someone – it would certainly take out all of the guess work and make things a whole lot easier, don’t you think? Love this. :-) So….in the spirit of Miss Taylor (of the Nashville Swifts), I present you with a list of how to get me:

(DISCLAIMER: I don’t presume that you want to get me specifically – most of these tips will apply to many females with brains in their heads and feet in their shoes)

 

You want this, don't you?

You want this, don’t you?

1) You mustn’t be lazy. That quality is never desirable, and women who tell you that they are okay with it are lying to you. For real. We want men who are hardworking, motivated, and ambitious. You don’t have to be the next Steve Jobs or a coal miner (those dudes work sooooooo hard it’s insane), but you do have to have some hustle to you. I am driven insane by the laissez faire attitude that is so common these days….’I don’t know, see what happens???’ Come on, guys….let’s get some get up and go!!! :-) Playing video games for hours a day, day after day, while in your sweats and smelling like CheeseDoodles is never cute. Ever.

2) You must woo. You don’t have to go over the top insane and chase me like it’s your job (although that’d be kinda fun, yes?), but you need to show interest. You need to put in the effort. I don’t require grand gestures (but I do think they are cool as hell), but you need to show that you are trying. Tries count for so much, you know that? How else are we supposed to know that you care?

3) You must be kind…and I don’t just mean to me – to everybody. If you treat the server in a restaurant like crap, then the day will come that you’ll treat me like crap, too…and I ain’t having it. If you’re anything less than respectful to the people in the service industry, then I am going to conclude that you think you’re better than other people – and, guess what? You aren’t. We all put our pants on one leg at a time, and nobody is any better than anyone else. Even you. So don’t bother. Just be nice…it’s really not that hard. I promise. :-)

4) You must have a sense of humor…because if we can’t laugh at life, we are likely to cry. Things around us can get really serious, and it’s hard not to get bogged down in the minutiae of life, even the littlest of things becoming massive catastrophes. It shouldn’t be that hard to laugh, my friends…. :-)

5) You must be smart. I can’t respect someone that I think is dumb….no way. And you absolutely must LOVE it that I’m smart. You need to encourage me, and be proud of the fact that in spite of my charm and flawless dance moves, I’m a clever clogs as well. ;-) This needs to be a good thing. :-)

6) You must not think I’m hideous to look at. I would like to say that you must find me cute/beautiful/pretty/gorgeous/attractive, but…let’s be real. I’m not those things, which is okay – it is what it is, but….I do hope that you will find me at least a bit fanciable. :-)

7) Finally, be thoughtful. I have such tremendous respect and admiration for people who are considerate of those around them. I love it when someone sends a message just to say hi, because they are thinking of you….that is great. :-) I think it’s awesome when somebody brings you a little trinket for no reason at all other than they dig the idea of making you smile – that’s awesome. (I truly do mean little trinket – ring pops and candy are always cool….I don’t mean that the poor guy has to go to Jared) Doors being held open, shopping bags being carried for you, someone who takes the garbage out – these things are amazing, awesome – and thoughtful. I love that. :-)

 

image

So….there you have it!! How to get most girls!! Easy, eh? Now…..go on and get started! I can’t wait to hear how you do!! :-)

 

xxx